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January 16, 2025 • 53min
5 Ways to Actually Make Your Habits Stick
The Mel Robbins Podcast
In this episode, Mel Robbins shares her research-backed system for making new habits stick. She explains that most people fail at habits because they try to manage everything in their head rather than creating external systems for success. The episode focuses on five practical strategies anyone can use to lock in new behaviors and become the person they want to be.
5 Ways to Actually Make Your Habits Stick
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Key Takeaways
- Most people quit new habits by day 19 - Understanding this common pitfall helps prepare for and overcome it
- Habits are simply patterns that can be learned and mastered with the right systems and approach
- You are what you repeatedly do - Your daily patterns shape who you become
- 5 Essential Systems for Making Habits Stick:
- Make it visible - Put reminders in your face
- Remove temptation from sight
- Track your progress consistently
- Create a detailed plan
- Do it in the morning when willpower is highest
- Missing a day doesn't erase progress - Research shows slip-ups don't impact long-term habit formation
Introduction
In this episode, Mel Robbins shares her research-backed system for making new habits stick. She explains that most people fail at habits because they try to manage everything in their head rather than creating external systems for success. The episode focuses on five practical strategies anyone can use to lock in new behaviors and become the person they want to be.
Topics Discussed
Understanding Habits as Patterns (6:00)
Mel emphasizes that habits are simply patterns that can be learned and mastered. Key points include:
- Patterns are designed to repeat - You can't break them, only interrupt and replace them
- You already have patterns in your life, both helpful and unhelpful ones
- New patterns become part of your identity over time
- "You are what you repeatedly do" - Your daily patterns shape who you become
The "What the H**l Effect" (14:00)
Mel discusses the psychology behind giving up after small slip-ups:
- Research from Duke's Dan Ariely shows people often abandon goals after minor setbacks
- Missing one day doesn't erase progress or impact long-term habit formation
- The key is getting back on track immediately rather than giving up entirely
- "Cut yourself some slack and keep going" - Focus on consistency over perfection
System #1: Make It Visible (22:57)
The first essential system is making habits visible and obvious:
- Put reminders in your face - Post notes, lay out clothes, set visible cues
- Rearrange your environment to support your goals
- Harvard research shows we make better decisions for our future selves
- Examples include:
- Taping goals list to bathroom mirror
- Placing water bottle by coffee maker
- Laying out exercise clothes the night before
System #2: Remove Temptation (30:58)
The second system focuses on removing obstacles and temptations:
- Get tempting items out of sight - Store them away or remove entirely
- Make bad habits more inconvenient to reduce likelihood
- Research from Google showed simply putting lids on candy bowls reduced consumption by 3 million pieces annually
- Examples include:
- Removing phone from bedroom
- Storing alcohol out of sight
- Putting unhealthy snacks in hard-to-reach places
System #3: Track Progress (35:13)
The third system emphasizes the importance of monitoring progress:
- Get tracking out of your head and into a visible system
- Research shows tracking increases success likelihood
- Methods can include:
- Wall charts with post-it notes
- Apps and digital trackers
- Physical journals or calendars
- "The only way to know you're on track is to track"
System #4: Create a Plan (43:35)
The fourth system focuses on detailed planning:
- UT Austin research shows specific implementation plans increase success
- Use "if-then" planning to prepare for obstacles
- Plan ahead for:
- Schedule conflicts
- Travel disruptions
- Social situations
- Weather challenges
- "Failing to plan is planning to fail"
System #5: Do It in the Morning (49:36)
The final system leverages peak willpower hours:
- Morning advantages include:
- Highest willpower levels
- Peak processing speed
- Maximum focus capability
- Fewer distractions
- Tips for becoming a morning person:
- Remove phone from bedroom
- Go to bed earlier
- Create morning accountability
- "Being an early riser is like a first domino that falls"
Conclusion
The episode emphasizes that successful habit formation isn't about willpower or motivation - it's about creating the right systems to support desired behaviors. By implementing these five research-backed strategies, anyone can make new habits stick and become the person they want to be. The key is moving from managing everything in your head to creating external systems that make success almost automatic.
Mel concludes by reminding listeners that they are "one decision away from a different life" and that mastering these habit-formation systems is the gateway to lasting personal change. The focus should be not just on what you want to do differently, but on who you want to become.